Christmas 2016 happened less than 2 months after we buried Steve. We all went through the motions becacuse we had too…. for the kids. But honestly, I felt like a fruad. I still sent out Christmas Cards, but they weren’t “Bright & Merry”… I did it because that’s what I do, I send out cards every Christmas. I mailed them along with Thank You notes to those that attended his Funural. Yes, it was weird.
When shopping for my inlaws, I was completely stumped. What do you buy for someone who just lost their son… their only child. Not much. Actually, NOTHING. But I came up with a couple of ideas – I printed a beauiful picture of Steve that I took of him while he was driving his boat. The water was in the background, it was a beautiful profile picture of him and I knew his dad would LOVE to look at it every day. His dad loved boating and being on the water… and his son. It was the perect combination. He LOVED it. He still looks at it every day.
We did Christmas of 2016 – but only because we couldn’t ignore it.
Fast foward to Christmas of 2017. I didn’t feel like a fraud this year. I felt good. I enjoyed shopping for everyone, putting thoughts into what they would like or better yet LOVE. Of course, in my shopping I came across so many things that Steve would have loved….. I’m sure that will always happen.
We’ve done the same thing for Christmas ever since Holly was born. My inlaws would come here on Christmas eve, sometimes the day before, spend the few days with us and head home the day after Christmas. Last year was no different.
But this year, we had to change things. Because of health issues, it was better for the girls and I to go to them, then the other way around. It was going to be different and the girls and I weren’t sure how that would be.
So Christmas morning, the girls and I got up, opened our presents then got ready to head to Nana and Papa’s. Very different.
That being said….. we had a GREAT Christmas this year! I enjoyed our morning together so much… it was different but yet it wasn’t. The girls and I have learned to enjoy our time together, just the 3 of us and Christmas morning was no different. Believe me, I was dreading it… instead, I loved it.
The ride to my inlaws was beautiful because it had snowed that morning. I told the girls take whatever they wanted to play with while we were there… and they did. We enjoyed the ride and sang almost all the way there. Smiles on our faces.
I brought dinner and gifts to their house and my aunt and uncle brought dessert. We sat down and took turns opening gifts and just enjoying everyone and enjoying the moment together.
I have to say, we had a beautiful day and a great Christmas.
On the way home, Holly said to me “Mama, I had a great Christmas!”.
That made it even better.