Back Surgery is Scheduled for Today

It’s a little over a month later and the girls and I have began moving forward with our life without Steve.  I won’t lie, it’s awful.  Some days are okay, but lately most are not.  I’m really struggling with this.  I thought I would be okay.  I thought I was prepared for this.  I thought I grieved the last 2+ years, and I thought that was hard.  This is worse.  I was no where near ready for losing him.  I was no where near ready for the pain of missing someone that has been in my life, every day for 18 years.  Especially losing them when you have no choice. I also thought we had more time.  I thought we had one more Thanksgiving… one…

A week ago Wednesday, Steve’s doctor ordered an MRI to get a better look at his spine and the tumors to see if Radiation would be good or not.  When the radiologist read the MRI he contacted Steve’s doctor and suggested that Steve go to the hospital immediately to have the spine doctors look at the MRI.  The concern was that the tumors were too close to his spinal cord and they were afraid of paralysis. So at 10pm last Wednesday night, Steve and I headed to Rhode Island hospital where they gave him a steroid to relieve some of the swelling around the spinal cord to avoid the compression.  The spine doctors then looked at the MRI and decided that with the steroid, there…

I  forgot to mention in my previous post that the CT Scan also showed that the inflammation of his colon and the small perforation in the colon that they saw last time, is no longer visible.  So that means that part healed.  That made us VERY HAPPY because that means surgery is not in the future again… which is a good thing.  Surgery is not something we want because that means no chemo for at least 6 weeks after and perhaps even more.  Right now Chemo is what he needs. That was my Christmas Gift! 

Steve had his 8th round of chemo this week and he’s pretty happy it’s over because he has a break and won’t be back to the infusion center for 4 weeks. Why the break?  He needed it for so many reasons and without it, going forward would have been way too hard. First of all, his CEA number is down to 11.  So that’s GREAT!  So if he’s going to take a break, now is a good time to do it since the number is still going down and the chemo is still working. But the real reason for the break is because he needs it physically and mentally.  Even with the reduction in the 5-FU, he’s still getting the mouth sores, but not as…

On Tuesday, June 10, 2014, we saw the oncologist from the hospital to get the final results from the biopsy.  We knew Steve had cancer but we didn’t know what kind so we weren’t sure what we were dealing with, yet. That was when we found out it was Colon Cancer.  And since it’s spread to 2 other organs (liver and lung), it’s Stage 4.  Colon cancer is not curable once it’s spread to other organs.  Therefore, Steve will never be cancer free.  🙁 The doctor said there really is no reason to operate since there was no large obstruction in the colon (since they didn’t see anything on the CT Scan) nor is there a lot of bleeding (since Steve has never noticed any)…

Today began round 6 of chemo.   It was the fastest and smoothest one yet.  We had one of our favorite nurses Erin (she was actually our first so that maybe why we like her so much).  The port worked great and Erin got the IV in right away with a perfect blood return!  So we were off to a great start. Steve feels good today, his appetite is up and he’s just in a good mood.  He’s been unhappy the past week due to another sore on his tongue.  When he gets these sores he can’t eat much or even drink much.  So think about it, would you be miserable?  I know I would!!  So it was a tough week but yesterday he started feeling…